Monday, April 12, 2010

Help confused?

i am 21 and have been with my boyfriend over 2 years. He is 25. At the beginning our sex life was great and as is when on holiday and such like however he lives the other side of the country and we dont see each other much as i like and i miss him terribly. however this puts pressure on me and i have recently been told while going through a difficult time that i wouldnt know kinky if it splashed me in the face and i dont excite him. He wants me to talk dirty, something i have made very clear im not happy with and to try new things but i work , am in college and am genarally tired, i then go home to him who shrugs at me and says i dunno and i bored with the routine of going upstairs to his boring,freezing room.Am i being frigid,Am i holding out for romance and excitement on a lost cause,please note i have bought books that he ignored and i do wear lingerie. im not very confident but i feel like im only wanted for sex, its that important to him hes leavinAny tips or should i just let it

Help confused?
hmmmm...well whether you should let him just leave without trying depends on how much you want to keep the relationship...it sounds as if you are both bored in different ways...when this happens very often both parties can become antagonistic and confrontational...a good way to get over this is to talk to each other and agree that you are both bored...maybe then both of you write a list of things that you like the other person to do...to give to each other...but make it read in a positive way...so for example...i really love it when you carry me to the bedroom...instead of... you never carry me to the bedroom anymore........also write a list of things that you dont like but in such a way that it just expresses how it makes you feel...for instance...i feel intimidated and nervous when you ask me to talk dirty because i dont feel comfortable with it........this way you are making positive statements instead of negative and no one should go on the defensive ........................in saying that if you want a quick and easy solution that may or may not last...book a bed and breakfast somewhere for the night...put on a coat with nothing underneath...meet him from work...tell him you have nothing on under your coat but he cant have you til you get to that warm cosy bed and breakfast....stand back and watch his head spin,lol....he'll appreciate the surprise and maybe start giving you some too...hope some of that helps...good luck...;0)
Reply:No this is not you, you should not do anything that you feel uncomfortable, you should bin this bloke.....quickly. otherwise you will find yourself in a rut....no confidence (he's already go that dropping) then depression, feeling useless and completely dependant on this bloke who will then be able to get you to the things you don't want to do cause you'll be scared of losing him.


your 21 work college your going somewhere, you need to make sure that you do and dont take him along with you.
Reply:wait to have sex with your HUSBAND-- stop having premarital sex and focus on loving God, fall in love with our Father in Heaven and watch Him give you a love here on earth you could only dream of!





premarital sex is unsafe, babies, stds, who wants that?!





your relationship with our Lord is the most important relationship.


if your bf cant handle that, he's not worth your time.





1 Corinthians 10:8


We should not commit sexual immorality





Matthew 22:37


Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.
Reply:If you have told him that you don't want to do something sexually, but he pressures you do do it, he's a jerk. You're not being frigid for not wanting to have sex and do things with someone that you don't want to do--you're being sensible. I think he is exploiting you--I can't tell you whether he loves you or not, but if anyone made me feel that sad and annoyed while I was with him, I would dump him (wow, that was a really oddly worded sentence).
Reply:The sexiest thing is to be wanted and appreciated. It sounds like your boyfriend is kind of a jerk. He's all about his needs but doesn't seem too interested in your needs. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and we are crazy excited about each other and our sex life makes both of us happy.
Reply:no love your just bored, spice it up or move on is my advice
Reply:. . . maybe you should try the opposite sex, so you're a guy into lingerie, so what, find a girlfriend who you can swap with . . .
Reply:agrees with suzie
Reply:He wants what he wants and you're uncomfortable and will not budge. That sounds like major incompatibility. What's left? I think you both need to move on. You'll never be happy and will probably end up splitting up sooner or later anyway. Might as well cut it while it's early in the "so-called" relationship.
Reply:take it easy sweetheart, relax and talk things over with him.........
Reply:Dont whatever you do wait til your married because that when it really does go down hill - sometimes fast and sometimes a little bit longer. So have the fun now and enjoy it you owe it to yourself so get the imagination going and show him whos the boss


good luck RTC


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